F Bomb!

There's this big ruckus about tonight's episode of "Modern Family."  A little girl utters the "F" bomb in polite company.   Now there are groups concerned about the welfare of families across the country.  This one episode rises to the level of child abuse.


I just giggle.


But it got me to wondering -  does anybody else remember their first "F" bomb?  Or any other four letter word that made folks recoil in shock and horror?


I do!


I was in fourth grade in the school cafeteria.  I was just randomly singing silly nonsense rhymes.  You know how Dr. Seuss made up nonsense words just to get a rhyme or a character?  That's what I was doing. 


Somehow the word 'duck' randomly came up and I started rhyming and  . . . "F" bomb!  My friend, Brenda, was sitting across from me and gasped.  She said it was a very, Very, VERY bad word.


I laughed.   


It was the silliest word I'd heard.  How could it be a dirty word?  It didn't even make sense.


So I sang it over, and Over and OVER again in rapid fire.  


"F-bomb!  F-bomb!  F-bomb!  F-bomb! F-bomb! . . ."  


My friend was giggling.  But there was definitely something about her giggle that wasn't a fun giggle.  It was more of a manic I-can't-believe-you-are-doing-this-because-you-are-going-to-die-and-I-feel-so-sorry-for-you-fool giggle.


About then,  my fourth grade teacher, Mrs. Lentz, whipped her head around with eyes bugging out like she got possessed by a frightened zombie.  


"STEVEN HALL!  Where did you hear that word??!"


Oops.


"I don't know.  I just made it up."


And with a curt, stern and deliberate tone she commanded, "Well you are never to say that word again.  Do you understand me?"


"Yes ma'am."  I stammered with embarrassment.


And I never said the F-word again . . . 


. . . until maybe college.  That's about when I even knew what it meant.  But I digress.


It's kind of lost it's power.  It's so overused.  I'm mindful of it but it's largely no biggie.  


I do, however, find its got no business in certain company.  I'm an adult.  I kind of figured out where I can and can't use it - not that I'm some boiling pressure cooker eager to use it.


While, I will admit, in REALITY, there's nothing cute about a child dropping the F-bomb, it's not drugs or unprotected sex.  Getting up in arms about it for a fictional t.v. show is just silly.  


There are some powerful parents and teachers out there that can handle it.  All it took for me was Mrs. Lentz's mega goliath eyes and stern, deliberate command to make sure that word never left my mouth until I was light years away from 4th grade.


Whew!